Edge of Threeteen: Will the Landslide Bring You Down?

Uncensored Life: first few hours home with our premature son living my NICU fantasies.

Tristan just asked me to dance. "Bigger, bigger hugs, mama, bigger hugs!" He stretches his arms up. "Spin, mama, spin bigger." I had been twirling around while cleaning the kitchen with Fleetwood Mac playing in the background.

When I lifted him into my arms the songs changed and we found ourselves with a slower number (but nothing I couldn't add bigger spins to): Landslide.

My life has never been without music and dancing and I've hoped Tristan's wouldn't be either.

Free spirits. Twirling, embracing life and love.

There were two things I'd dream about in the glider during those months in NICU. I wanted to slow dance to Edelweiss with Tristan in my arms - no cords attached, barefoot in our new home. I also wanted to know what it was like to lay down with him. Two months propped in a chair that only appeared comfortable.

It's interesting how some songs can grow along with your life and remain relevant. I thought about this as my much heavier son and I danced around the room, his arms around my neck.

I've never known my life without their music.

Tristan's pasta finished cooking. He returned to The Regular Show in the other room and I listened to Landslide again...I can't imagine it fitting any more perfectly into my life than now. Who else would I build my life around other than my husband and child? They are my forever.

If I could baby I'd give you my world but until you go your own way I will be here to give you bigger, bigger hugs and twirls.

Oh, mirror in the sky, what is love?
Can the child within my heart rise above?
Can I sail through the changing ocean tides?
Can I handle the seasons of my life?

Well, I've been afraid of changing
'Cause I've built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Even children get older
And I'm getting older too

Well, I've been afraid of changing
'Cause I've built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Even children get older
And I'm getting older too
Oh, I'm getting older too

NICU moms never take a moment for granted; or a moment to remove their hospital bracelet before living the dream.